I want to apologise

I would like to apologise to the homeless man who scared the crap out of me tonight, I didn't mean to be rude by closing my door in your face. You just scared me. Let me explain. A coworker kindly offered me a ride home tonight. And when we saw you and your friends sitting together in the dark parking lot we were not afraid. You were just hanging out...that's cool. and when we offered you our left over pizza you seemed cool with that. It was only when you sneaked up behind me while my butt was in the air that I freaked and slammed the door. It may be that you just wanted to thank us for the pizza but I was startled. I feel terrible that I may have offended you. Please accept my apology, I did not mean to be impolite.

Sincerely,
Noree

Happier Things

"Poetry is what he thought, but did not say." - Heather McHugh

I'm making an effort to think positive thoughts today. Positive thoughts don't lend themselves to poetry as easily as brooding, melancholy thoughts. We think so many things that never come to fruition. The mind is a great incubator. What happens to these "dreams deferred," these poems?

With me, today, it is letters unwritten that consume me. I compose a dozen in my head but they never make it to paper. To different people...old friends, old loves, new loves, people I've never met before. I'd like to have all of these letters sent out some day.

I like to think that I am brave sometimes. "Live Out Loud," used to be my credo - before Roger's wireless adopted it as their corporate slogan. (How could they do that?) But I'm not really brave, maybe I'm foolish, naive, arrogant, reckless. I can't put my finger on it exactly. It's my heart...you're right J, it is huge...and my mind...I'm tirelessly curious...And my love of the ellipsis!! I feel like I'm ten again running through a vast field or tumbling down a grassy hill in white pants!! I want to do it all, see it all, be it all. These poems in my head are going to explode if they don't find an outlet soon!

The Great Philosopher Jager

"You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you just might find you get what you need." - M. Jager

Ok, not a philosopher per say but a wise man none the less.
Maybe getting what I want would be terrible. The Buddha says that all desire is suffering, we experience suffering because we experience desire. But isn't it worth it? Each moment of suffering is a reminder of how wonderful not suffering is. Oh whatever Noree, everyone has heard this crap before. Blah blah, "Tears are a miracle!", blah blah, "There is no 'Painting' without 'Pain'." Wanting something you can't have is just...annoying.

Poetry Corner

'One Art', It is a great poem by Elizabeth Bishop from my Handbook of Heartbreak - edited by Robert Pinsky. ( Some of you may recall that Robert Pinsky is a former Poet Laureate of the United States and Simpson's guest star.) Ok, I realise it is pretentious to use one's blog to share adventures in Post-Modern poetry but I have few people to talk with about this sort of thing now that I am out of school. So, I might post poems I like on here from time to time. Be thankful, I could spend entire entries voicing my disgust with crappy academic labels like"Post Modern."
It is an art... losing. I think we are in error when we call unfortunate people "Losers". One must posses something first in order to lose it. Most so called "losers" never "have". It takes courage to embrace failure, accept rejection, endure embarrassment. As Leo Tolstoy once said, "The most common and the most widely used deceit is the wish to deceive not other people, but yourself. And this kind of life is the most harmful." Perhaps those who have learned to lose are the most fortunate.
Put that in your pot and spank it! (Just Kidding!)

One Art

Today Is A Bad Day

I am really not happy today. McDonald's has decided to discontinue my favourite kind of McNugget dipping sauce. Sure, in the grand scheme of things this is fairly minor. As a good friend pointed out, I "don't have syphilis or cancer or something really bad." But that is not the point. To add insult to injury the inside of my McNugget container said "change is good." Change is not always good!!! Change is just different, and sometimes what we value about bad food like McDonald's is that it is always the same. McNuggets are comfort food not, "Hey let's try something exciting and different" food. I thought I knew where I stood with the McNuggets yesterday. Now I just don't know.
I can try to tell myself that I don't need the McNuggets, that I'm too good for the McNuggets anyway, or that everything happens for a reason and that maybe this is all for the best. The fact of the matter is that I want hot mustard dipping sauce and it's not available and that sucks! Oh, who am I kidding...this isn't just about dipping sauce. I'm tired of constantly losing the few battles that I choose to fight! Nice girls sometimes finish last, without hot mustard sauce while some "fillies" trot through life blissfully unaware of just how fortunate they are. Just once I'd like to get what I want.

Can't We All Just Get Along!

Many moons ago I signed up for internet service with AOL Canada. I knew many people at the time who were also subscribers and it was easier to keep in contact with them on AOL. Now everyone I know has MSN messenger and I too am trying to jump on that band wagon. AOL and MSN do not like each other apparently and I am having a difficult time signing onto MSN using AOL. :O( Now Noree is out of the loop because of the stupid rivalry between two mega corporations!! I am peeved! Can't we all just get along for the sake of the children (aka Me!).

The premiere of "Runs With Scissors"

Blogging is hip! So I've heard anyhoo. I have been reluctant to start a blog, thinking that perhaps I haven't anything interesting to say. There is, however, something cathartic about speaking mindlessly to an unknown audience. It is like having a conversation with the universe. Not the people of the universe but rather the universe itself. Is that pretentious? Definitely. Do I care? Not enough to stop the dialogue...or monologue. If the universe does not respond I'm okay with that. I'm just putting the words out there.