Life's Gonna Suck - By Dennis Leary
Life's gonna suck when you grow up, when you grow up, when you grow up
Life's gonna suck when you grow up, it sucks pretty bad right now
Hey, if you know the words, sing along
You're gonna have to mow the lawn, do the dishes, make your bed
You're gonna have to go to school until you're seventeen
It's gonna seem about three times as long as that
You might have to go to war, shoot a gun, kill a nun
You might have to go to war when you get out of school
Hey cheer up kids, it gets a lot worse
You're gonna have to deal with stress, deal with stress, deal with stress
You're gonna be a giant mess when you get back from the war
Santa Claus does not exist, and there is no Easter Bunny
You'll find out when you grow up that Big Bird isn't funny
Life's gonna suck when you grow up, when you grow up, when you grow up
Life's gonna suck when you grow up, it sucks pretty bad right now
You're gonna end up smoking crack, on you're back, face the fact
You're gonna end up hooked on smack and then you're gonna die
And then you're gonna die
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
There is no "I" in Win!! - Steve Holt
No Steve, there is an "I" in win...if you write it in English. (Unless you spell it phonetically, in which case it doesn't, but only a linguist would do that. Geeks!)
I almost got hit by a car today. It was my own fault. I tried to cross the street after the little hand started to flash red.
I won't lie...I wouldn't have minded getting hit by the car too much. I really need a holiday and well, two broken legs would be a good excuse to stay in bed and watch movies for a few weeks. If I had been hit by a car at least I would have an excuse for feeling crappy and depressed. I might as well have a gaping head wound or semi-detached limb of some sort...my heart feels like it has been through a blender.
Woe is Me.
I almost got hit by a car today. It was my own fault. I tried to cross the street after the little hand started to flash red.
I won't lie...I wouldn't have minded getting hit by the car too much. I really need a holiday and well, two broken legs would be a good excuse to stay in bed and watch movies for a few weeks. If I had been hit by a car at least I would have an excuse for feeling crappy and depressed. I might as well have a gaping head wound or semi-detached limb of some sort...my heart feels like it has been through a blender.
Woe is Me.
Friday, October 20, 2006
Bus Of Thought
We talk about trains of thought, well this is Noree's "bus" of thought from this morning...
This morning I took the bus to work in the dark. This happens at this time of year around this latitude - going to work before the sun comes up and then returning home after the sun has gone down. On the bus were two students discussing music theory which somehow led to a discussion of Jim Croce and the song "If I Could Put Time In a Bottle". I was listening-in because theirs was the only conversation on the bus. Their talking led me to think of Kermit the Frog and the following poem:
[IF]
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!
--Rudyard Kipling
The poem reminds me of Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason...the 2nd book not the second movie...When Bridget is in the Thai jail and she repeats this to herself to keep from breaking down. In 2001 this poem was always in my wallet on a small scrap of yellow paper. It stayed there until it became shreds of pulp and lint. I rediscovered it today and it is above my computer at work. It is placed just high enough that if I lift my head to look at it any tears that may be welling in my eyes will go away.
I'm kind of sensitive this week.
This morning I took the bus to work in the dark. This happens at this time of year around this latitude - going to work before the sun comes up and then returning home after the sun has gone down. On the bus were two students discussing music theory which somehow led to a discussion of Jim Croce and the song "If I Could Put Time In a Bottle". I was listening-in because theirs was the only conversation on the bus. Their talking led me to think of Kermit the Frog and the following poem:
[IF]
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!
--Rudyard Kipling
The poem reminds me of Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason...the 2nd book not the second movie...When Bridget is in the Thai jail and she repeats this to herself to keep from breaking down. In 2001 this poem was always in my wallet on a small scrap of yellow paper. It stayed there until it became shreds of pulp and lint. I rediscovered it today and it is above my computer at work. It is placed just high enough that if I lift my head to look at it any tears that may be welling in my eyes will go away.
I'm kind of sensitive this week.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
When Life Goes To Shit....
Make shit-aid. (Like Lemon-aid.)
I can't think, or talk, or write right now. So, as I often do, I am going to borrow someone else's words. Leo Tolstoy, "A Calendar of Wisdom" :
The meaning of life is revealed to those who are ready to accept the things which will be revealed. And it is he who has already decided that he will accept the truth as it is, and not the truth itself, which will change the way of life he has been accustomed to.
Who am I? What should I do? What should I believe in and what should I hope for? All of philosophy is in these questions, said the philosopher Lichtenberg. But among all these questions, the most important one is that which is in the middle. If a person knows what he should do, he will understand everything which he should know.
The real meaning of life is not possible to embrace, if you are looking for the universal meaning of life. And at the same time it is so simple that it can be explained to fools and to infants when what to know is what you should do as an individual.
(Yeah...Thanks a lot Leo! There's more...)
The most important knowledge is that which guides the way you lead your life.
It is harmful to eat when you are not hungry. It is even worse to have sex if you lack desire. But even more harmful is to try to think when you do not wish to, or to be engaged in meaningless intellectual activity. Many people do so when they want to improve their position.
(And my personal favorite for today...)
The more urgently you want to speak, the more likely it is that you will say something foolish.
Touche.
I can't think, or talk, or write right now. So, as I often do, I am going to borrow someone else's words. Leo Tolstoy, "A Calendar of Wisdom" :
The meaning of life is revealed to those who are ready to accept the things which will be revealed. And it is he who has already decided that he will accept the truth as it is, and not the truth itself, which will change the way of life he has been accustomed to.
Who am I? What should I do? What should I believe in and what should I hope for? All of philosophy is in these questions, said the philosopher Lichtenberg. But among all these questions, the most important one is that which is in the middle. If a person knows what he should do, he will understand everything which he should know.
The real meaning of life is not possible to embrace, if you are looking for the universal meaning of life. And at the same time it is so simple that it can be explained to fools and to infants when what to know is what you should do as an individual.
(Yeah...Thanks a lot Leo! There's more...)
The most important knowledge is that which guides the way you lead your life.
It is harmful to eat when you are not hungry. It is even worse to have sex if you lack desire. But even more harmful is to try to think when you do not wish to, or to be engaged in meaningless intellectual activity. Many people do so when they want to improve their position.
(And my personal favorite for today...)
The more urgently you want to speak, the more likely it is that you will say something foolish.
Touche.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Elimination Dance
So, I think if you've read this blog thingy of mine before you will know that I am cuckoo for poetry. I love the shit - but only the shit that is the shit if you know what I mean. (Yes, I am blogging under the influence right now but rightfully so.) Tomorrow is my birthday and as far as birthdays go I imagine it will neither be the worst nor the best. I am very grateful to my friend(s) who are making a solid effort to ensure that it is not sucktastic , but it is a daunting task. I myself have resigned to the fact that the special boy is not going to remember and my family is likely to forget as well. I'll probably have a bad hair day and a family of mice will eat the cake I baked for myself. Pouty Pout Pout!! As I sit here arms folded, my lower lip protruding, I am reminded of some brilliant poetry by Michael Ondaatje - "The Time Around Scars", "The Cinnamon Peeler", pretty much anything by him. However the most fitting to my mood is a series of statements he has entitled "Elimination Dance." Lawrence Ferlinghetti did something similar with his "I am waiting..." sentences. Basically Ondaatje eliminates the people, or actions he finds pretentious or annoying. I adore them all but here are some of my favorite. I hope you you feel some angst or something toward them...or maybe chuckle. If not read the first two poems I mentioned they are sure to make you cry or sigh in awe. Anyhoo...as promised these are some of the people to be eliminated:
"Those who (while visiting a foreign country) have lost the end of a Q tip in their ear and have been unable to explain their problem"
"All the actors and poets who spit into the first row while they perform"
"Men who fear to use an electric lawn-mower feeling they could drowse off and be dragged by it into a swimming pool"
" Any dinner guest who has consumed the host's missing contact lens along with the dessert"
"Any person who has lost a urine sample in the mail"
"Those who have accidentally stapled themselves"
"Women who gave up the accordion because of pinched breasts"
"Anyone whose knees have been ruined as a result of performing sexual acts in elevators"
"Any lover who has gone into a flower shop on Valentine's Day and asked for clitoris when he meant clematis"
"Anyone who has testified as a character witness for a dog in a court of law"
" Any writer who has been photographed for the jacket of a book in one of the following poses: sitting in a 1956 Dodge with two roosters; in a tuxedo with the Sydney Opera House in the distance; studying the vanishing point on a jar of Dutch Cleanser; against a gravestone with back lighting; with a false nose on; in the vicinity of Macchu Pichu; or sitting in a study and looking intensely at one's own book"
That last one is my favorite I think. If you have any to add please let me know I'd love to hear them. I feel less pouty already.
"Those who (while visiting a foreign country) have lost the end of a Q tip in their ear and have been unable to explain their problem"
"All the actors and poets who spit into the first row while they perform"
"Men who fear to use an electric lawn-mower feeling they could drowse off and be dragged by it into a swimming pool"
" Any dinner guest who has consumed the host's missing contact lens along with the dessert"
"Any person who has lost a urine sample in the mail"
"Those who have accidentally stapled themselves"
"Women who gave up the accordion because of pinched breasts"
"Anyone whose knees have been ruined as a result of performing sexual acts in elevators"
"Any lover who has gone into a flower shop on Valentine's Day and asked for clitoris when he meant clematis"
"Anyone who has testified as a character witness for a dog in a court of law"
" Any writer who has been photographed for the jacket of a book in one of the following poses: sitting in a 1956 Dodge with two roosters; in a tuxedo with the Sydney Opera House in the distance; studying the vanishing point on a jar of Dutch Cleanser; against a gravestone with back lighting; with a false nose on; in the vicinity of Macchu Pichu; or sitting in a study and looking intensely at one's own book"
That last one is my favorite I think. If you have any to add please let me know I'd love to hear them. I feel less pouty already.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Maybe I am 10!
I have new mittens. They are practical in the sense that they are well constructed with polar fleece lining etc...but they also have fins. Essentially they are shark puppets. I love them. Does this make me immature? Sometimes I like being ridiculous and the shark mittens make me smile. Why do some adults feel that they have to leave this sort of simple joy behind after age ten? I hope to have crazy tea pots when I'm 80!
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Monday, October 02, 2006
The Dealio
Ok, so here's the deal. I don't know what the heck I am doing with my life. I'm scared shitless about what I should be doing next...as if what I do next means everything! What does making a huge mistake at this point in my life mean? It means nothing. I should not be so afraid to create, to fail, to disappoint. Back in the days when I was creative and articulate, back when I could write and speak with a certain amount of aptitude - I had ideas. I must write more and read more and not censor myself or worry about failure or my feelings of inadequacy. I should not allow punctuation and grammar to hold me back from dreaming big and being bold in my actions. Baby steps toward sanity, job fulfilment, and life enjoyment.
Pretty Words
If the sea could dream, and if the sea
were dreaming now, the dream
would be the usual one: Of the Flesh.
The letter written in the dream would go
something like: Forgive me - love, Blue.
- Carl Phillips
were dreaming now, the dream
would be the usual one: Of the Flesh.
The letter written in the dream would go
something like: Forgive me - love, Blue.
- Carl Phillips
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